On the weekend, I was at a country town pub with a mate, having a beer. A local bloke gave us a bit of lip, we told him to fuck off, and then we sat down and watched the rugby on the tv.
Delightful. After the game, we were chatting to a couple of local women about nothing important, and generally having a good craic.
The guy from earlier on came up to me.
"That’s a fucking hipster beard, mate."
"That’s pretty bold for a man wearing that ridiculous hat."
He kinda looked upwards and then turned to one of the local women and said “What’s wrong with my hat?”
My mate and I finished our pints and walked back to the house where we were staying.
"Fuck, man," I said as we walked along the gravel road, "can you fucking believe that guy?"
My mate turned to me and said dryly, “Yeah. You completely bitch-slapped him. Well done, slugger.”
It’s important to have mates who call you on your bullshit. And let’s be honest, this beard is starting to want its own unicycle.