Who needs a unifying theme anyway?

I also do Stuff My Girlfriend Says which is a lot funnier than this. Mostly because my girlfriend is funnier than me.
Recent Tweets @indefensible

You guys have been all lesbian-y today. This makes me anxious. See, most straight guys have a fantasy about doing the business with two lesbians.

Not me.

I’m paranoid they’ll show my girlfriend an awesome time and then she’ll be like “later, cock-monkey!”